Monday, September 28, 2009
i've been doing some thinking recently... about life, the future, my friendships, kinships, God.
God has been extremely good to me. blessing me with so much... though its my first time applying to an overseas uni with many paperwork to do. i don't feel lost. in fact, it felt tat God is right here with me every step of the way. From granting me this scholarship, to getting enough money on time to pay for the initial payment for the tuition fees myself first, to having friends now gg there with me, and so much more to come. i learn to place my trust in him.
recently some r/s were put to the test. honestly am a little lost..the heart and mind is not in peace. the heart desires not what the mind wants. yesterday night while lying on the bed, God seem to be telling me that, the way i felt treated by X seems to be the way i'm treating my family. If i can give so much to the pple outside, why can't i focus this energy on my family as well? And on my pillow, i decided, i will try.
22 this year. i constantly pause and asked myself, what do i want to do with this life? it felt meaningless to just go work everyday. if only the world could stop spinning so that i can pause and think, but sadly, it doesn't. when i wake up the next day, no matter how i'm feeling, i would still hv to go to work. where i am suppose to be. but life is more than that.
the counselor who gave the training i went said today said,' A man in his 30s if have not been able to form meaningful r/s, would find that his life is very empty'. it struck me that i do not wan to wait till i'm 30 to realize the root of my emptiness, instead, i dun wan that day to come. prevention is better than cure isn't it?
Jesus says "In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: 'It is more blessed to give than to receive.' " Acts 20:35
I want to give back to the society what it has bless me with and more. Why are we always waiting to go overseas to help. Why can't we first start helping and giving where God has first placed us to be.
i remember reading this, it asks,' why bother helping this one person? you can help one but can you help the rest?"
and the reply was something i never forget. " i can't save the world, but if i can make one small difference to this one life. why not?" we ain't superheros. we can't save the world. but if we all just save one. imagine the impact it would create. that one child may be no one to you. but what if.. he was?
Friday, September 4, 2009
'it's ok...let it go'
was what i heard God said to my vexes today
it wasn't said in a brush-me-off tone but more of in the way a mom would speak to her kid when he fell down and scratch his knee. looking into his eyes, knowing his pain in her heart while gently sweeping off the dirty particles off his knee with one hand, ' its ok...'
today as i contemplated sms-ing someone r/g my frustrations...
i tot, whats the point. no one would really understand anyway...
so instead of sms-ing, i begin throwing everything off unto my heavenly father.
bottled up feelings, anger, irritations, vexes...
and i know, he can fully comprehend every emotion said and unsaid.
thus when he told me, ' its ok...let it go'
i knew he said it bcos he loved me so
Sunday, August 30, 2009
what a long time since i last updated. life has been busy!!!!
for a brief update of what i've been doing
- went on a cruise trip to redang recently with 3 wonderful pals. that place is simply beautiful. God is amazing. i love that place. the first time i canoe. v fun. i like gg to the clifts. seeing the fishes swim ard me as i wade into the sea. love the extremely relaxing 3D2N trip where we ate, relax, suntan, hv fun.
- sign up for my australian university. waiting for their reply nxt month.
- register for my accomodation over at australia
- checking out bank acct and how to transfer money
- thinking abt life over at australia and future plans, wondering how God is gg to lead me.
- sign up at canosivile children's home and still waiting for their reply
- planning farewell dinners, making good-bye cards
and last but not the least, getting ready for my trip to colmar tropicale in 2 days time!
Thursday, August 6, 2009
went on a photgraphy trip today.
the bear out of hibernation after 3 days. finally.
but it took only a few hours to wear me out.
guess the battle is still raging inside.
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
yesterday noon, i drag myself outta bed and found my entire body aching to every movement. the comtemplation to take MC was so strong with my nose dripping away, i made a pact with God, if i had fever, i'll nt go work, if not, i'll drag myself there. took my temp and verdict was: 37.4. bleah.
reluctantly, i put on my uniform and shoes and pull myself to the bus- stop. even sitting was a pain with the constant aches in my entire body. walking up the 'mountain' of SGH just made it worst.
finally, i made it to the ward and took my temp once more. 37.9!!! woohoo! and i threw in the white flag. can't work. went to staff clinic to see the sign at the door '1-2 break time' and i was like! WTH! urgh!!
so there i sat, with a raising temp that was causing me a mild headache, waiting for the drs to be back. frm their break. while i wither here slowly. all the time asking myself how could they hv break time thats not staggard like ours? its a hospital for goodness sake...break times.... irritating.
thank goodness,a book of edward cullen kept me company through for an hr.
exactly at 3, i started to grow more impatient. no longer could i focus on the book, the body aches were causing quite a distraction and i started pacing ard. with every of the million and one times the clinic nurses walked in and out raised the hope that my name or number be called, but always, they were fruitless hopes. till 345 did i finally managed to see the dr...after like almost 2hrs! rolls eye.
verdict: mc 3 days. viral infection. rest. if it gets worst, come back to me.
and there i am... sleeping at home for 3 days. zzzzzzzz
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
to wen: sorry i din crop your pics and all cos something went wrong with the software. irritating. but anyway, CONGRATS once again! you're now a usefull and contributing member of the society. haahahahahaha.
today was a celebration of an irony of events.
to nicole: Happy Birthday!
to sis dorothy: FAREWELL.....
i'll definitly miss dorothy...what a joy she has been. sigh...
made a scrapbook card and gave it to her. i really love that card.
nicole on the other hand had light blue cupcakes. they look so pretty sis tan asked: can eat anot huh? hahaha.
its been a long time since 19 nurses gathered at one go.
i love getting people together.
i love the laughters and smiles.
i love good quality time.
i love us being together like one huge family.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
ROMP '09
first time i'm asked to be the official photographer for a huge event. thank God. i love it.
in the sun whole day. sweating. walking. tired. but still, i love it.
will most prob talk more abt the same some other time cos i'm so beat to do it now. yawns...
p/s: tell me what you guys think abt the pics so that i can imprve k? cheeros!
